I’m not saying anything any writer (including me) doesn’t already know, but I have to relearn this truth again and again.  The harder a scene that touches on something painful is to write the likelihood that you’re getting closer to what you’re really trying to say increases.

Write scared.  Write sweating.  Write on the edge of panic.   Bring something to the page that is worth the time a reader gives up to live in the world you’ve created.